π All jokes π
Forums βΊ General Discussion βΊ π All jokes π-
When I was in the 7th grade I used to ask a lot of questions.
One day, I asked my English teacher, "Why do we ignore some letters in pronunciation....
Like the letter H....in Hour, Honor etc?"
She said, "We are not ignoring them, they're considered silent."
This even confused me more.
During my lunch break, my teacher gave me her packed lunch and asked me to heat it in the cafeteria.
I ate all the food and returned her the empty container.
My English teacher said, "What happened?
I told you to go heat my food, and you are returning me an empty container."
I replied, "Ma'am, I thought the 'H' was silent."
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βπ₯Grouchoπ₯β wrote:
π€£π€£ that's bad lolWhen I was a kid, I used to love making sandcastles with my Grandfather. -Until my mom took the urn away from me.
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BERSERKER33 wrote:
π€£I just got my doctor's test results and I'm really upset about it. Turns out, I'm not gonna be a doctor.
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βπ₯Grouchoπ₯β wrote:
πππππππWhen I was a kid, I used to love making sandcastles with my Grandfather. -Until my mom took the urn away from me.
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Stloen..
My husband and I were discussing a living will yesterday. I told him, βI never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluid from a bottle. If that happens, pull the plug.βHe got up, unplugged the TV and threw out my beer.
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Stolen - ππ
A good relationship is when she is by your side during the bad times to tell you that none of this would have happened if you had just listened to her.
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I got kicked out of Home Depot this morning. The manager asked me what I was doing in the break room. I said, "I'm on break." He said, "You don't even work here."
I said, "I just finished using the self checkout, so clearly I do. -
It's been six months since I joined the gym and still no progress.
So, I'm going there in person tomorrow to see what the problem is. π€ -
There are 2 Nunspeet walking outdoors net to a mine,
1say dam mine stinkt
The onder say ya mine to π -
Nuns
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Fucking translate this is it
There are 2 nuns walking past a mine, one says the mine stinks, the other says mine too -
blauwewafelz wrote:
π€£πFucking translate this is it
There are 2 nuns walking past a mine, one says the mine stinks, the other says mine too -
blauwewafelz wrote:
Fucking translate this is it
There are 2 nuns walking past a mine, one says the mine stinks, the other says mine tooWhat kind of meat does the Pope eat on a Friday?
Nun
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Barry Vertigo wrote:
Lolblauwewafelz wrote:
Fucking translate this is it
There are 2 nuns walking past a mine, one says the mine stinks, the other says mine tooWhat kind of meat does the Pope eat on a Friday?
Nun
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A math teacher held up a ruler and said at the other end of this stick is an idiot....the student said "which end?!"
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Λβ₯ΰΏβ³β±₯β Λβ§α’βΊβ₯β³Λ৑༠wrote:
Lol πA math teacher held up a ruler and said at the other end of this stick is an idiot....the student said "which end?!"
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Itβs a 5 minute walk from my house to the pub, but itβs a 45 minute walk from the pub back to my house. The difference is staggering
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What do you call a hooker with a runny nose?
Full.
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Two nuns driving through a graveyard when vampire jumps on the car. The nun driving told the other nun to "get out and show him you cross"
So she jumped out grabbed him and shouted in his face "GET OFF THE FUCKING CAR!" -
βπ₯Grouchoπ₯β wrote:
ππππItβs a 5 minute walk from my house to the pub, but itβs a 45 minute walk from the pub back to my house. The difference is staggering
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G U E S S W H O wrote:
ππππππππTwo nuns driving through a graveyard when vampire jumps on the car. The nun driving told the other nun to "get out and show him you cross"
So she jumped out grabbed him and shouted in his face "GET OFF THE FUCKING CAR!" -
Uglyladdie wrote:
π€£π€£G U E S S W H O wrote:
ππππππππTwo nuns driving through a graveyard when vampire jumps on the car. The nun driving told the other nun to "get out and show him you cross"
So she jumped out grabbed him and shouted in his face "GET OFF THE FUCKING CAR!" -
I was was golfing this morning and paired up with an 80-year-old, who was giving me some marriage tips.
The best one was when we were leaving the 18th hole.
He said, "Don't talk to me in the parking lot!
I said, "Why not?"
He said, "My wife is picking me up and she thinks I went deaf 10 years ago.
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β«· π πππΈ π β«Έ wrote:
Seen this one before, laughed so hard the first time I saw it πI was was golfing this morning and paired up with an 80-year-old, who was giving me some marriage tips.
The best one was when we were leaving the 18th hole.
He said, "Don't talk to me in the parking lot!
I said, "Why not?"
He said, "My wife is picking me up and she thinks I went deaf 10 years ago.
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I found stir fry all over my bed this morningβ¦. - I must have been sleep wokking again.
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βπ₯Grouchoπ₯β wrote:
πππππππI found stir fry all over my bed this morningβ¦. - I must have been sleep wokking again.
I donβt know where you get these but they are hilarious π€£ -
When I was young man, I didn't have very much money. My mom always said, "Work until your bank account looks like a phone number."
Finally, after 40 years of hard work, "Mom, I've made it!!"
Available Balance $9.11 -
YOU wrote:
of course stolen.... not a man lolWhen I was young man, I didn't have very much money. My mom always said, "Work until your bank account looks like a phone number."
Finally, after 40 years of hard work, "Mom, I've made it!!"
Available Balance $9.11 -
Uglyladdie wrote:
they are ππ tyβπ₯Grouchoπ₯β wrote:
πππππππI found stir fry all over my bed this morningβ¦. - I must have been sleep wokking again.
I donβt know where you get these but they are hilarious π€£ -
YOU wrote:
Already done bud, beat ya to that one!The only thing flat earthers have to fearβ¦β¦
Is sphere itself!
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