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Bumping! Donโt let the flame die out!
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๐ฆจ๐จ๐ฅ
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Which knight invented the round table?
Sir Cumference
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Uglyladdie wrote:
๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃWhich knight invented the round table?
Sir Cumference
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NikeShoes23 wrote:
ty ๐Bumping! Donโt let the flame die out!
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What do you call a belt made of watches?
A waist of time
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โซท ๐ ๐๐๐ธ ๐ โซธ wrote:
I got you ๐.NikeShoes23 wrote:
ty ๐Bumping! Donโt let the flame die out!
Not why, but HOW did the chicken cross the road?
I threw it.
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What did Harry potter do that the Jews couldn't do.
he escaped the Chambers
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I just got my doctor's test results and I'm really upset about it. Turns out, I'm not gonna be a doctor.
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Today, I asked my phone โSiri, why am I still single?โ and it activated the front camera.
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What does my dad have in common with Nemo? They both canโt be found.
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I visited my new friend in his apartment. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
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A woman complains to her friend that her husband is losing interest in sex, and he prefers nights out with the lads to the joys of copulation. Her friend tells her that to win his love she must make more effort. She advises her to cook a slap-up meal and then send him drinking with his pals down the pub. When he returns she must be dressed in her naughtiest lingerie and look her most beautiful.
The following evening, she does exactly as instructed and is dressed to kill by the time her husband returns. When he sees her lying on the bed in all her gear, he tells her to stand up and take it all off. He then tells her to do a handstand against the bathroom mirror and open her legs. This excites the woman immensely, as her husband has never been this erotic before. She does as instructed, and then he puts his face between her legs, faces the mirror and says, โNo, no โฆ Maybe the lads are right. A beard wouldnโt suit me.โ
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Who was the naughtiest character in Star Wars?
R2D2. All of his lines are bleeped out.
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What is the naughtiest equation?
B=D
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The naughtiest thing I ever did was have sex on a ferris wheel.
I really got around. -
Incase anyone does wonder I won't lie some are made by me by true event like the ferris wheel and made up just top of my head and some are taken by others that people I know told me from before from work to family. Can't lie who ever idea it was to make a room where people can post jokes amazing idea.
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A women tried to scam me yesterday she said hello sir im calling today because of insurance claim you been in a car accident in my head I was thinking what the actual fuck I don't even drive she then said may I ask how many accident you been in and I said wellllllll uuuuuuuuuummmmmmm I been in 273 accident oh nope sorry 274 last one got hit by a food truck the women reaction was priceless hahaha
(Based on a true story to me yesterday)
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BERSERKER33 wrote:
๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃI just got my doctor's test results and I'm really upset about it. Turns out, I'm not gonna be a doctor.
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NikeShoes23 wrote:
๐คฃโซท ๐ ๐๐๐ธ ๐ โซธ wrote:
I got you ๐.NikeShoes23 wrote:
ty ๐Bumping! Donโt let the flame die out!
Not why, but HOW did the chicken cross the road?
I threw it.
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BERSERKER33 wrote:
๐คฃ you got her lolA women tried to scam me yesterday she said hello sir im calling today because of insurance claim you been in a car accident in my head I was thinking what the actual fuck I don't even drive she then said may I ask how many accident you been in and I said wellllllll uuuuuuuuuummmmmmm I been in 273 accident oh nope sorry 274 last one got hit by a food truck the women reaction was priceless hahaha
(Based on a true story to me yesterday)
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An 85-year-old man was visiting his doctor for his annual check-up.
โSo Mr Jenkins, how are you feeling?โ the doctor enquired.
โDoctor, Iโve never felt better,โ Mr. Jenkins responded. โIโve even married my 18-year-old girlfriend recently and sheโs now pregnant with my child. So, how about that then?โThe doctor considered this momentarily and then said, โLet me tell you a story, Mr. Jenkins. A friend of mine was a avid hunter. One day he went out in a hurry and accidentally picked up an umbrella instead of his gun.โ
โReally?โ said Mr Jenkins.
โYes,โ said the doctor. โAnyway, he was in the woods when suddenly a very large grizzly bear appeared in front of him. He raised his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle. And do you know what happened?โDumbfounded, the old man said, โNo doc, what?โ
โThe bear dropped dead in front of him,โ the doctor replied.
โNo doc, that canโt be right.โ said the old man. โThatโs impossible! Someone else must have shot the bear.โ
The doctor smiled and said, ๐ e -
It won't take the word exactly ๐ฅ
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How much does an influencer weigh?
An instagram!
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Uglyladdie wrote:
๐คฃ๐คฃHow much does an influencer weigh?
An instagram!
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Stolen..
I had an awful day fishing on the lake this morning, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one.On my way home, I stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish.
I told the fish salesman, "Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you?"
He said, "Why do you want me to throw them at you?"
"Because I want to tell my wife that I caught them."
"Okay, but I suggest that you take the orange roughy."
"Why?" I replied.
"Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if you came by, I should tell you to take orange roughy.
She prefers that for supper tonight."
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Stolen: My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. Weโll see about that.
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Laughing is not allowed in Hawaii- everything must be kept to a low ha.
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When I was a kid, I used to love making sandcastles with my Grandfather. -Until my mom took the urn away from me.
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โ๐ฅGroucho๐ฅโ wrote:
Now that was funny ... At 75 years old it gives me an idea for my grandsons....thanks ๐๐ป๐๐ปWhen I was a kid, I used to love making sandcastles with my Grandfather. -Until my mom took the urn away from me.
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