The TW home.
Forums › General Discussion › The TW home.-
What type of home is this!!! The owners don't go outdoors at all! They might look through the blinds every now and then but their light is iPod borne! Lol
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Mayblater is the neatly folded badly worn gimp suit which is kept as evidence against the village yokel with his insistent cries. Senoritamafioso is the earring sitting on the mantelpiece that you had robbed the night before.
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Godess,the doorbell rings and it's Nick the rent collector as it is his house.Agirls opens her letterbox to let you peek out and RaiKou turns off the light quickly but Nick knows you're inside.Even Belial the welcoming mat can't convince him you're not despite his insightful arguments.
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Budgie is the stuffed bird of the same name that has dried out human eyes sewn into its head.
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Picasso has his name smeared in excrement all over the front hall wall!
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The Man is a spotless trophy that is regularly shined and boasts an amazing plaque and wins.
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Memphis Mafia is the diary written on discarded tampon boxes that you dare not throw out and you keep hoarded for the joy of reading them.
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DKillermon stars as the pouch for your iPod.Its heavy padding and lethal design( it has razor blades stitched into aid) would leave you in stitches.
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Messrine is the 2 litre bottle of spirits (Rum)that you clutch tightly in your hand.The cat eyes the bottle and likes a tipple of it in its milk.You wave it nonchalantly at the sepia photo of Vadan and spit curses all the whilst.
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vishbume wrote:
I hate parrots, can we feed him to the cat? (sorry Mr BC)WhillBilly as the 27 string guitar,of course, and the parrot that randomly spouts crap is
dr death316 ( add any asshole's name here).The lamp gives it the odd charge or two.Obsidian is the exotically crafted goblet that was fashioned from a ferret's head. -
Hyena,The Cat will be fed thar annoying parrot piecemeal.
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vishbume wrote:
"Even Belial the welcoming mat,"Even Belial the welcoming mat can't convince him you're not despite his insightful arguments.
😂 I love it!
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Ages is a pager that is inside the couch that nobody has bothered to fish out.(But we do care about it- 5,000 alerts on it!) :)
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CptSpiderjabberingmonkey is a toothpick shredded to a thread from using it to needle out the prime blackheads on the neighbours nose.God knows what that is doing lying around!Still,all in all, good to keep just in case.
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Now, Who else? I see a used rubber under the melted candle but can't make out the name on either item.Appear to be globs of shit on it. :(
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vishbume wrote:
I've always wanted to be a blind. There is no windows in my office so if I was one they would have to give us a window, then I'd make it look good with my beautiful features and block the sun if needs be as a protector.T Dawg is the chattering old neighbour with his mug pressed against the window spouting something about PAX his eyes are shredded by the playful acts of Big Cat.This continues until you close the blind who is Ramb.
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TheRamb Add: 86 wrote:
Yep you got that right Buddy.Block out the nattering faces with their stories of sunlight and suchlike. Only the premium bling needless to say.vishbume wrote:
I've always wanted to be a blind. There is no windows in my office so if I was one they would have to give me us window, then I'd make it look good!T Dawg is the chattering old neighbour with his mug pressed against the window spouting something about PAX his eyes are shredded by the playful acts of Big Cat.This continues until you close the blind who is Ramb.
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Shrinut is an old VHS tape with a vintage porn film showing Dallas recorded on it.Half way through though ( the money shot of course) Telly Tubbies comes on.
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Mr.DoDg3 wrote:
+1Baron Von Fritz wrote:
You can be the one that's take the piss out of people that can't spell rightQuite the charming read, sir...I wonder what my own person would be...Hmmm...
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Very good thread old bean 👍👍👍
What about RandomBloke? Or did I miss him when I read
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Baron Von Fritz wrote:
Maybe the auto correct on the iPhone?Mr.DoDg3 wrote:
+1Baron Von Fritz wrote:
You can be the one that's take the piss out of people that can't spell rightQuite the charming read, sir...I wonder what my own person would be...Hmmm...
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Hyena wrote:
Definitely. 😉Baron Von Fritz wrote:
Maybe the auto correct on the iPhone?Mr.DoDg3 wrote:
+1Baron Von Fritz wrote:
You can be the one that's take the piss out of people that can't spell rightQuite the charming read, sir...I wonder what my own person would be...Hmmm...
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Hyena wrote:
Yeh we all no how shitty autocorect is.Baron Von Fritz wrote:
Maybe the auto correct on the iPhone?Mr.DoDg3 wrote:
+1Baron Von Fritz wrote:
You can be the one that's take the piss out of people that can't spell rightQuite the charming read, sir...I wonder what my own person would be...Hmmm...
Go to www.damnyouautocorrect.com -
😂😂😂😂
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Yay I'm porn 💏
Wait vintage 👵👴 -
Where is Yan in that?
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My opening post merely introduced and listed the items that no garage sale would want so I want to expand on each:
OTB is the wall to wall carpet that is sports a scene of ancient Troy being attacked by Hannibal and his hippos who had crossed the Rubicon.The hero points his thumb at Hitler. The company that made the carpet are long out of business as the darn thing is too tough to wear down! -
แอ้ม
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Knight the remote boasts many many buttons but only 3 work!The on,off and on buttons.The remote is huge and just about fits under the coffee table and shines with a build up of popcorn grease.It has smatterings of blood and feather on it from being used to clatter the parrot.
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Demacia the elephant stump pains you still when you look at it. You had many years ago hunted and faced down a large bull elephant with only a Bren and pack of grenades to call on.But you nailed that smart bastard but only the feet were salvageable. You had them stuffed and threw a party back at home and 1stump was stolen. eBay had one up for auction and you won the bidding...a collection of stumps must number 4! Well, demacia turned up and much to your disgust it was a baby elephant stump. The collection is worth shit now.
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