The real AMA
Forums › General Discussion › The real AMA-
Ghetto Monstazz:follow up question, can you fart vowels?
....
Vowels you say? Nay good Sir for to do that would lay the charge of charlatan at our doorstep. The prestige of some mongrel thought to say "sausages" on prime time tv.
Time would be better spent straining oneself with a surfeit of lust,indulging in flicks,ticklers,tumblers and the like with a pair of huge breasts.Nay. Such vulgar excercises with these beautiful mammaries would merely deflect us from our path, leading to ever spiraling levels of depravity. Rather the way of the enlightened haunch:the proud buttocks with its airs and its flaunting majestic globes.
Lubracations with a rhapsody,a symphony, a mere ditty is the tongue of the Anus.There rests truth with an easy mind. -
ThatTallKid_ wrote:
Boff tzzzip tizz parp:vishbume wrote:
Advise on how to enjoy the game more?ThatTallKid_ wrote:
Press thy ear to the wonderduct my child.vishbume wrote:
Yes, all knowing orificeThatTallKid_ wrote:
Enter. Come closer and speak little one. Yea.Approach the all knowing orifice.Have a question, can you give some advice, general advice, thanks
Be tolerant,do not expound your business before a rabid pack and never push too hard for it may start pushing back. -
vishbume wrote:
praise be.Ghetto Monstazz:follow up question, can you fart vowels?
....
Vowels you say? Nay good Sir for to do that would lay the charge of charlatan at our doorstep. The prestige of some mongrel thought to say "sausages" on prime time tv.
Time would be better spent straining oneself with a surfeit of lust,indulging in flicks,ticklers,tumblers and the like with a pair of huge breasts.Nay. Such vulgar excercises with these beautiful mammaries would merely deflect us from our path, leading to ever spiraling levels of depravity. Rather the way of the enlightened haunch:the proud buttocks with its airs and its flaunting majestic globes.
Lubracations with a rhapsody,a symphony, a mere ditty is the tongue of the Anus.There rests truth with an easy mind. -
vishbume wrote:
Your confusing me😲, at least it's something tho thanksThatTallKid_ wrote:
Boff tzzzip tizz parp:vishbume wrote:
Advise on how to enjoy the game more?ThatTallKid_ wrote:
Press thy ear to the wonderduct my child.vishbume wrote:
Yes, all knowing orificeThatTallKid_ wrote:
Enter. Come closer and speak little one. Yea.Approach the all knowing orifice.Have a question, can you give some advice, general advice, thanks
Be tolerant,do not expound your business before a rabid pack and never push too hard for it may start pushing back. -
Havoc,Bella gone. Sadness and disbelief reign.The air is pregnant with the talk of departure.....But here too,the air is heavy with the pong of anal tears. One of our top performers has been forced to take an early retirement.A feed of beans by an open fire was not a great idea.
Spare a thought for this person's plight.A thought for unsung farts.A thought for splatterless sadness from an original artist. Sigh,we must go on. -
Her beauty was not immediately apparent.In fact,one could never accuse her of this virtue.But she was much sought after. Her raw boned features had the palour of an unwashed turnip with eyes pressed tight into each other that loaned an intensity the the lass.Her moist nose peppered in blackheads invited tweezer antics. She was tea-bag breasted and spoke in a sad contralto between clucks and clicks.
All was answered on seeing how this little minx had braided her rump hairs.Long wiry plaits that would and could raise any brow ( no doubt in envy) tied by cute little polka-dot ribbons.
"Marry me",you would say.BUT...be prepared to comb those knots out! -
We had one unsatisfied mendicant complain of lagging. The gorilla finger seemingly poked out s-l-o-w-l-y and retracted back into its hole at the same maddening pace. Lube was administered and seemed to have rectumfied the problem.According to current logs,(still lying around), normal service is back.
Support took this with a pinch of salt and fried onions. -
Halcyon days indeed.
A visiting monk,most pious Othard Thadius Bonesetter regales us with a limerick between sittings:There once was a hairy gash,
That had come out in a rash,
In went his finger,
With a smell to linger,
That he took it out in a flash.
.
.
Brings a tear to my eye. -
The good name of AMA is being soiled by false prophets.Decadent party steamers pour forth from their cheesy rings.Noxious vomit runs down their chins.Do not trust nor approach them for they take the title AMA in vain.
-
Whereabouts to be thinking,
Beating of breast on the hour,
Wrapped in shivering madness,
Whisper vespers shadowed with aching,
And the solitary tower
Stands away in the darkness.
..................................................Please don't forget to leave the loo roll next time.
-
I've been afraid to even ass whistle lately.But service is more or less back to normal. Allow me to recount good people my tribulations.
I went to the toilet to throw out some garbage and surf the GD forums all the while.I dropped off a few in ebbs and flows and got up and examined the load. Impressive and nuked so much as to lose shape.I wiped and checked each wipe and was much pleased. But Wipe wipe wipe wipe. What the Fuck! There was no noticeable end to the task in hand.I got so desperate that I found myself forced to neatly fold a paper towel and nestle it between me dirty arse and the jocks in order to avoid the skid marks. I had to go to work and ,I'll tell ye,I walked around conscious of it and feeling worried that co-workers guffawed about my nappy padding. -
Funnily enough, the paper was whiter than white when I got home. It was a miracle! This item can be viewed in a glass box with holes to allow sniffing by pilgrims at their pleasure.
P.s:Can't help but feel that if I hadn't used it,my jocks would have been well stained! -
vishbume wrote:
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😳💩I've been afraid to even ass whistle lately.But service is more or less back to normal. Allow me to recount good people my tribulations.
I went to the toilet to throw out some garbage and surf the GD forums all the while.I dropped off a few in ebbs and flows and got up and examined the load. Impressive and nuked so much as to lose shape.I wiped and checked each wipe and was much pleased. But Wipe wipe wipe wipe. What the Fuck! There was no noticeable end to the task in hand.I got so desperate that I found myself forced to neatly fold a paper towel and nestle it between me dirty arse and the jocks in order to avoid the skid marks. I had to go to work and ,I'll tell ye,I walked around conscious of it and feeling worried that co-workers guffawed about my nappy padding. -
We were led a merry tune by a Master artificer who generously rucked up his cowl on a whim and performed a peek-aboo show. Such laughs and elbow nudging to see the head slip in and out.
Not to be outdone and in the atmosphere of festivities,one local lad did the same ( though his cloth was of a lesser quality) and performed dangling tricks where he could cling-on to the turd. When we voiced concern on how this was wiped without smearing,he answered simply by actually sucking it back up as if it were a spaghetti! Genius!
A cap was passed around and the audience tipped quite generously may I add. -
"Magikers and conjurors!",exclaimed a befuddled lass. She seemingly had a grand shit and felt its release.She swore it was so.She even had felt the flash.What surprised the vixen? I hear you ask herself. Well,she had looked into the bowl only to find clear unplolluted water! No turd in sight! She called her darling husband to look and he was perplexed for he could catch the tell-take waft of brown thunder but could see head nor tail of the blither.He even went so far as to wipe her fundament but to no avail. Magic? Voodoo? Neither my friends for 'twas merely a ghost shite.
-
A real crowd splitter.
-
Which brings us to the infamous floaters.No matter how much you flush they keep resurfacing to glare back at you.Bobbing up and down, they are oblivious of your anxiety as somebody is waiting to enter the loo after you. Down you bastads.
Or the one where you had groaned so much and is so epic that you feel the need to invite family or friends to marvel at its proportions with its back clogging the bend whilst you beam proudly with hands on hips. That image will sit with them awhiles ,I promise you,and forever be discussed... "Remember Uncle Cedric's 10 footer?".
Or the time you slipped in quickly to the public jacks and to your horror discover shit virtually crawling up the bowl.What to do? Go out immediately and state that it wasn't you? Or simply leave the cubicle uttering aloud curses against the perpetrator?."The dirty fucker who did that should be shot,somebody with a vertical asshole". -
Many a time I've had to clean toilets like that when I worked in a bar.... Then go up and serve nosh to the patrons ( after washing my hands of course).
Ahh, such memories.
It is times like this that Rudgicus should regale us with his adventures of eminent erudition (crudition). -
Hark the fateful Bombshell,
Rang the death knell,
The body went all a jitter,
Felt the force of a shitter,
No lovemaking she'll tell.
......................................... -
OneThumbBastard wrote:
I am proud. Reminds me of that great 80's series: Brown Thunder.... but that is not the delicate sound of thunder. More like the indelicate sound of lasagna. At least there was no particle release.👍
😤💨💩🌾
-
I enjoyed a visit to the emporium gallery earlier and feel I must comment on one of the works on display kindly loaned by the Bumthrush Abbey Gallery.
We see before us a twinkle eyed sitter coated in sweat.The artist used chiaroscuro and has kept a discreet distance thus we can only appreciate the strainings and are not allowed into the inner sanctuary.A distinctly diaphanous wisp of silk lightly stained an ochre-umber provocatively hangs from the a tightly clasped hand that covers the finely cross hatched hams.A plumb of steam from a hidden source suggests recently dropped stools.
Not quite a secular image,we are warned not to interrupt this special moment.Thick blue heavily splattered velvet pantaloons prop up the feet. -
A meaningful background of "Thomas the tank engine" wallpaper surrounds the figure and serves to heighten the tension with its garishly painted locomotives that expel plumes of smoke to mirror the recent excercise.One dramatically foreshortened arm appears to stretch left out of the picture intending to clutch at something. We may correctly ascertain that the figure is without bog-roll; comedy and pathos in union.
The work is titled "The interloper" by the great Dookie Drippingson. -
*plume of steam. Though Plum/Plumb may imply a fruitiness/or delving into depths.
-
I put forward the argument:
Vocally assisted craps are usually peppered with curses.....
Or words of encouragement? -
Our scientists were challenged to communicate with the town loon.Their project was to be axed but today they have recorded a cascade of free flowing chunky shit as it made its exit! And,They were then able to decipher a sentence:
DEATH™ wrote:
To be honest most of you in this game wont stand a chance with me in the street, iv grown up street fightin, n not jus petty litl fites here and there, my greatest hobby was to fite everyday with any1 who thought they cud tke me down, no 1 has ever kum back after my 1st punch, id eat most of u for breakfast, there is no need to get so personal over a GAME i no it can get quite serious at times and that is what mkes it so good, but not to actually cause real bloodshed over it, your not setting a good example for the naive players on here
-
They were able to tell us that all the ranting and babbling boiled down to total bullshit!
Now,this got me thinking about something that had happened earlier: Did the sexy number next door fart out an invitation for coffee? -
Of course she did. The sound of flushing has not yet damaged your hearing, nor diminished your capacity for translation.
-
vishbume wrote: Boff tzzzip tizz parp:
Pearls of wisdom right there.
Be tolerant, do not expound your business before a rabid pack and never push too hard for it may start pushing back. -
The Far Side wrote:
Nor some fun filled frolics and merry tumbles. HeheOf course she did. The sound of flushing has not yet damaged your hearing, nor diminished your capacity for translation.
-
Deliveries of "mana" was delayed for over an hour today.A young lad full of life and beans had volunteered to provide some manure for minor readings. We gave the kid a chance to prove himself and he duly skipped off to the loo.
Tick, Tock,Tick, Tock and more feckin' ticks and tocks.
Finally,a steward kicked open the WC door and found our volunteer shanking!
Dirty sod.Had got it into his head to relieve them blasted beans as he took a dump.Wasteful and conceited.
Needless to say that we ran him off, the dirty shanker.
Purchase Respect Points NEW! · Support · Turf Map · Terms · Privacy
©2021 MeanFreePath LLC