Kids will say anything!
Forums › General Discussion › Kids will say anything!-
Post your funny kid quotes. I'll go 1st.
While sittin 'round the Bon Fire tonight, roasting hot dogs... My 6 year old girl says....
Her: "dad, are you round because you are too busy to go to the gym?"
Me: "round?"
Her: "well, I didn't want to say 'F.A.T.',"
Me: speechless :) -
My little brother was over at his friend's house, and as soon as he walks through the door, he cringes, and says, "it smells horrible in here"
-
Took my son (5 at the time) to a hockey game. During intermission, he had to pee so off to the restroom we went. I took him into the stall to use the toilet as he was too short for the urinals. When he was done going pee, it was my turn. I had him stand behind me but he peeked around me mid-stream and said in his loud kid voice "wow daddy, you have a big bird!" That's our kid term we used for penis. Let's just say I had a lot of snickers on the way out.
-
Read this online the other day...
"My four year old son climbed up into my lap, said that he loved me and then announced that when he 'got big' he was going to marry me. My husband said, 'you can’t marry mommy when you grow up, she’s already married to me.' Connor looked him straight in the eyes and calmly said, 'well you’re going to die soon and she needs a husband' then patted him on the forearm, promptly kissed me on the cheek, said 'I love you mommy' and hopped down."
...Funny, weird, with a pinch of creepy. 😕
-
I have grandchildren that refer to one of their grandmas as "Shopping Grandma" cute but concerning!
-
LaTortuga wrote:
What do they call you?I have grandchildren that refer to one of their grandmas as "Shopping Grandma" cute but concerning!
-
Darken💀Rahl wrote:
Bankrupt Grandpa!LaTortuga wrote:
What do they call you?I have grandchildren that refer to one of their grandmas as "Shopping Grandma" cute but concerning!
-
Or better yet, Penniless Pa!
-
вᵃԀ тṵʀғᵃ wrote:
😂😂Darken💀Rahl wrote:
Bankrupt Grandpa!LaTortuga wrote:
What do they call you?I have grandchildren that refer to one of their grandmas as "Shopping Grandma" cute but concerning!
-
I went to Disney with m family when I was younger. Waiting in line for splash mountain, my brother who was 5 at the time, points at the people behind us and says "Gross! These people smell like the sewer!". Let's just say the next 30 minutes in line were very awkward.
-
LaTortuga wrote:
I can relate...8 grand kids .... No way I can keep up. 6 are boys and every other sentence is Dood...look at this. And what did you do before you got old. Guess I'm am old "dude"I have grandchildren that refer to one of their grandmas as "Shopping Grandma" cute but concerning!
-
Having a bit of nucky about 2am when the door burst open,
4 year old stood there , we both jumped like you do, she shouts " I'm trying to sleep and you two are waking me up doing your excersise "
-
While out and about with the missus, we encountered a young mother with a toddler. Turned out I knew the mum from school so we stopped for a quick 'how do'. The little girl put out her arms to me and cried "DADDY.... Tuddle daddy"
😳 took a bit for her in doors to see the amusement of it all.
-
My 6 year old niece went to the beach with my wife and I. Upon meeting a group of older ladies in black swimming suits, my niece inquires, "Why are you all wearing black?"
The leader of the Black-suited ladies replied, "Why, because black is slimming, dear."
And then my neice said, "Well it's not working." -
Took my 5 yo nephew to the restroom at a restaurant. Another guy comes in and uses the urinal next to him. When the guy finishes, my nephew says "good pee, bro". I had to explain that you don't compliment strangers on how competent they urinate.
-
Sitting in Denny's having breakfast a few months ago. It was packed. Out of the blue my daughter starts yelling "I have poop! I have poop!" (Which she didn't)
Embarrassing to say the least. -
Had my oldest daughter at mcdonalds. She was about 4 at the time. There was a huge dude in front of us waiting to order. Izzy looks at me and says "daddy, I bet he eats ALL his food!" Very awkward wait after that.
-
My 4 year old son will sit in the shopping cart and thrash about screaming "Help! Heeeeeeelp! Please help!" whenever we tell him "no" to some toy that he doesn't need to add to his collection. Always tend to get some weird looks.
-
My sister's kids are holy terrors. Twin brother and sister, 7 year old, demons. I have to watch them when they visit because my sister and brother in law are drinkers and get hella drunk in hotel rooms. One time I had to take the dog to get 13 stitches. Word of advice to all parents: never give five-year-olds BB guns and send them to their pretty cool uncle's tiny apartment.
-
I was at a crowded dome for the Justin Timberlake concert with my family. After sitting down my 7 year old brother announces he has to pee. I agree to take him. As we walk to the bathroom, my brother points at a ripped tall guy and screams,"He's Fat!!"( he didn't quite understand the concept of fat. Most embarrassing moment of my life. Spend five minutes apologizing to the man.
-
вᵃԀ тṵʀғᵃ wrote:
Haha. Sorry. Had to laugh.Darken💀Rahl wrote:
Bankrupt Grandpa!LaTortuga wrote:
What do they call you?I have grandchildren that refer to one of their grandmas as "Shopping Grandma" cute but concerning!
-
I think I got a good one , my oldest was 3-4 we were sitting at thanksgiving dinner he looks up from his highchair right at his grandmother ,looks at her very seriously and blurts out " Hey grandma show me your titties " 😱😳
-
One of my worst occurred when i was at McDonald's and a child with Down syndrome was wheeled in. My youngest bro took one look at him and announced he's stupid. I felt like crawling into a hole and dying...
-
And announced,"He's stupid!!"
Lol had a typo
-
pudge wrote:
😂😂😂Post your funny kid quotes. I'll go 1st.
While sittin 'round the Bon Fire tonight, roasting hot dogs... My 6 year old girl says....
Her: "dad, are you round because you are too busy to go to the gym?"
Me: "round?"
Her: "well, I didn't want to say 'F.A.T.',"
Me: speechless :) -
Here's a funny one.. READ IT!
I have a 5 year old spoiled brother. So whenever me and my siblings wanna do something or travel or anything we send the smallest brother because he's spoiled and my father loves him so much. So once I told him to tell my father if we can travel somewhere in the upcoming holidays.. And before sending him off I would tell him not to shout out my fathers answer to me later.. So he goes and asks my father and my fathers says no/yes.. He would be shouting from the begening of the corridor "AMZ AMZ PAPA SAID YES WE CAN GO THERE"... Which makes my father hear everything and thinks that I planned the whole situation! And ruins the whole plan ! It is pretty funny and awkward. 👌😂
-
I have two that just happend last week. My son, 5yo, has a doctor apt and is wearing a teenage mutant ninja turtle jacket on. So the doc looks to my son and asks "are u a teenage mutant ninja turtle?" And in a snotty ass attitude my boy says "NO, this is just my jacket! I'm a baseball player". We all busted out laughing.
-
The other is my 2yo daughter is on the sidelines of my above mentioned sons baseball game. In front of everyone she asks my wife "mommy do you have a mirror?" Wife says no but y do u need a mirror? 2yo responds "I just wanted to look and see how beautiful I am". Wow that was embarrassing. Lol
-
♛ Ꭺ ][V][ Ꮓ ♛ wrote:
My lil sis was the same way 😑Here's a funny one.. READ IT!
I have a 5 year old spoiled brother. So whenever me and my siblings wanna do something or travel or anything we send the smallest brother because he's spoiled and my father loves him so much. So once I told him to tell my father if we can travel somewhere in the upcoming holidays.. And before sending him off I would tell him not to shout out my fathers answer to me later.. So he goes and asks my father and my fathers says no/yes.. He would be shouting from the begening of the corridor "AMZ AMZ PAPA SAID YES WE CAN GO THERE"... Which makes my father hear everything and thinks that I planned the whole situation! And ruins the whole plan ! It is pretty funny and awkward. 👌😂
-
In the que at the shop with my then 4 year old a big lady stands behind us (obese) my daughter turns round to her and says " wow your the fattest lady I've ever seen"
Help
![[][]](https://turfwarsapp.com/img/app/ajax-forbutton.gif)
Purchase Respect Points NEW! · Support · Turf Map · Terms · Privacy
©2021 MeanFreePath LLC