Best man duties

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༺ ᗪᗰᒪ ༻ Mar 5, 2013

Hi guys,
My best pal is getting married in June and Im bestman. Ive never done this before nor have my mates. So Im looking for a bit of advice;
1. Advice for the speech and witty lines or jokes,
2. Gift ideas for him and her- the groom and bride.

Im real busy at the moment and will be up to the wedding. Thankfully the grooms brother is helping with organising stag party. If anyone can help me out here it would appreciated it!
༼ཋ༠ཧཧརསར༽ Mar 5, 2013

Hey dml i too was a best man for the first time last yr i looked on line literally googled "best, bestman speach" i found one that closly resembeled what i wanted to say and reworded it to fit my exact situation, everyone told me it was the best speach they ever heard at a wedding...
༼ཋ༠ཧཧརསར༽ Mar 5, 2013

Also u r now obligated to listen to ur friends relationship BS for life and u must give advice to keep them together / dealing with the issues of being married...
Ojibwe Mar 5, 2013

Your only duty is to prevent the bride from being kidnapped. :)
💩💩ᎡᏌᎠᏀᏓᏣᏌᎦ💩💩 Mar 5, 2013

I'm doing it again for the second time in may and its a scary prospect for me.....again.
I too went to the Internet and took pointers from the many speeches but mostly made it my own.key points are funny stories and generally just take the piss out of him,I don't want to blow my own trumpet but I like to think I'm pretty witty and got a good load of laughs with congratulations after so job was well done.
Nerves were a big downer for me but some people are fine,try and enjoy it that's my only advice and stick to around 5-10 mins,anymore and you may bore people👍
BellaItaliana Mar 5, 2013

The way most of my male friends seem to do it is they basically roast the groom for a few minutes, make jokes about how the bride is too good for him, tell a few funny stories about the groom to warm the crowd, nothing too terribly embarrassing to share in front of their whole families, and then a story that speaks to the character and good nature of the groom. Then, as a nice added touch, I've heard them welcome the bride to the family & say something very nice & sincere about her.
Thumbs Riley Mar 5, 2013

ℬeƖƖɑIƗɑƖiɑɳɑ wrote:
The way most of my male friends seem to do it is they basically roast the groom for a few minutes, make jokes about how the bride is too good for him, tell a few funny stories about the groom to warm the crowd, nothing too terribly embarrassing to share in front of their whole families, and then a story that speaks to the character and good nature of the groom. Then, as a nice added touch, I've heard them welcome the bride to the family & say something very nice & sincere about her.

This. Please no stories involving illegal activities or moral turpitude - all his in-laws will be there and don't need to know that stuff.
🌾ᏦᎻᎪᏞ🌾 Mar 6, 2013

Put $150 cash into a card and leave it on the table.

As for the speech, make intimate, inside jokes but dont get personal. Digging at the groom is funny, digging at the bride is not funny. End with something sentimental and from the heart. Make it about them, not about you. 👍
Kaͣrͩaͩs Mar 6, 2013

༼ཋ༠ཧཧརསར༽ wrote:
Also u r now obligated to listen to ur friends relationship BS for life and u must give advice to keep them together / dealing with the issues of being married...

Don't you do that anyway?
What would I know? I'm public enemy number one right now.
ℱᵃƖ🐝Ɩᵃʗყ Mar 6, 2013

I gave a best man speech a few years ago that people still bring up. I'll tell you this - as with any public speaking, the more work u put in, the better the outcome will be.

My advice - try to be sincere. Write a speech that touches on your friend and contains facts and funny stories that friends and family in the audience will be able to appreciate. Don't be afraid to speak from the heart. Don't over do it with one liners or generic jokes u hear at all weddings (one or two are ok). I typically find to many of these to be lame and insincere.

The speech I gave poked fun at the groom but was tasteful. Remember - the speech isn't about you - so no matter how ur speech begins, make sure it ends with the focus on them. A clever toast is also nice (I used "may your lives be full of love and laughter, and may you live happily ever after" - it was very well received)

Finally - practice your speech out loud, at home as many times as u can. Delivery is AS important as the content.
AmNeZ Mar 6, 2013

Don't go to Vegas and DO NOT let the groom get a tattoo on his face
Hyena Mar 6, 2013

Best speech I have heard required audience participation. It depends on the crowd but the you start by congratulating the groom and then turns to the audience and says as part of your duties you have been helping clear up the flat for the new wife to walk in (if she already lices wuth him say you were clearing out the office or storeroom) and if the owners of this lingerie could please collect it (holding it up, and have the best looker you can convince to come and collect it). You also say that now they are married you need them to hand in the spare sets of keys to the apartment/office/storeroom. Have about half a dozen hand you keys all pouting and looking sad. It works best if you can include a couple of gay guys or older women to get that extra chuckle.....

Then you get into the all seriousness he is a great bloke and damn lucky as he has found a beautiful wife. Give a couple of nice stories that show him in a good light and wrap up the speech.
mojopilot Mar 6, 2013

Ojibwe wrote:
Your only duty is to prevent the bride from being kidnapped. :)

That and monitor the grooms alcohol intake. Too little and he won't want to go through with the wedding. Too much and he might try to marry a brides maide. It's a fine line, enjoy it!
Oh, bachelor party is on you too.
randombloke Mar 6, 2013

What Bella Said. I have only ever been a Best Man once and I will never do it again (except for my brother - if he asked) due to the hassle involved. Whilst an honour and all that, it is so much more than just the speech. You are basically there to ensure the day runs as smooth as possible for the bride and groom and for the whole event. Don't even get me started on arranging the stag night.

Only once the cake is cut and you've delivered your speech can you start relaxing and really having fun. So be prepared for that and a real long day. Remember it's not about you or you speech (tho the speech is important) it's about getting the couple through the day.

Good Luck and enjoy.
MalAdOsteo Mar 6, 2013

Rent Hangover 2 and copy, word for word, the speech Allen gives at the dinner.
༺ ᗪᗰᒪ ༻ Mar 7, 2013

Thanks for the advice guys, some good tips here
BellaItaliana Mar 7, 2013

Any advice for MOH toasts? Those are a bit more delicate, I have to give one in May & I have only compiled about 2 mins of material in the past 6 months.
★fnord★ Mar 7, 2013

randombloke wrote:
What Bella Said. I have only ever been a Best Man once and I will never do it again (except for my brother - if he asked) due to the hassle involved. Whilst an honour and all that, it is so much more than just the speech. You are basically there to ensure the day runs as smooth as possible for the bride and groom and for the whole event.

Good Luck and enjoy.

I was gonna say, one of your main jobs is to make sure the other groomsmen are in ship-shape and on time. They and you should be at the venue at least an hour ahead of time to help with the setup. Make yourselves available to whoever is in charge for whatever they may need. Without some direction from you, the other groomsmen will likely act like complete inconsiderate boobs, trust me.