👏Turf wars times-week 3👏

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Jerry Balls Feb 8, 2013

Writers will be posting through out the day,thanks!
Jerry Balls Feb 8, 2013

👉Turf wars times👈 by vishbume.
Sojourns in Htrae,the mirror world.
Allow me to tell you of a trip I have taken to Htrae recently.
It all started as I heard a band of wayfarers singing on my lands and heaping weeds in great quantities onto a blazing fire.They seemed to be inhaling the pungent smoke in great quantities;pushing and shouting,trying to shoulder into the heat of the action,so to speak.Foolish smiles split their bladder top-knotted heads and they raised angry out-cries as others cursed and elbowed them aside to breath the smoky waft.
I was incensed with the trespassers and went with a will and smote the first red-eyed and flushed individual with my cane. Others fell to my dervish attacks until I found myself in the midst of smoke and press of people. I inhaled deeply and swooned from my exertions and my barks of admonishment soon gave way to slurring.The crudest sensations overcame me and I remember little else as I ventured to Htrae,the other world......
Jerry Balls Feb 8, 2013

"Stupid Noob Of The WEEK!!!"
Hi fellow turf warriors and welcome to this week’s addition of “Stupid Noob Of The Week”. This week my top nominee is fried chikin. I have personally seen a PM from him calling someone out to a REAL LIFE FIGHT! Let me quote fried chikin “5:00 pm tomorrow, behind the theater, depending on traffic, I might be a little late, I’m 4 years deep in hapkido, so get ready to get beat, see you there”. Again just WOW!!! That is close to something a kid said to me in 5th grade but it was at the flag pole after school. Grow up dude! Challenging someone to a fight is childish. In today’s world fighting is a sport not a tool used to get your way or intimidate people. Hopefully his parents taught him NOT to use his fists in anger because when you get older it only lands you in jail. Keep your emotions under control and remember; THINK BEFORE YOU TYPE!!
👉Turf Wars times,written by M@D👈
『тӈԑ•ʟɛɢɪɵɳ』 Feb 8, 2013

Great stuff so far! Can't wait to see the rest!
༄☣βŁιnd☠Łιmιτ☣༄ Feb 8, 2013

😂😂😂
SeñoritaMafioso Feb 9, 2013

***One day, the word HORSE was having an internal dispute regarding the significance of its individual letters…***

“So you’re saying that you think you are more important to this word than moi?” R asked, crossing his legs.
“That’s exactly what I’m saying,” S affirmed with a nod.
“Guys, each letter is equally important to every—”
“Oh shut it, H!” O interrupted his neighbor. “Some letters just don’t need to be there! Is B important to COMB? Is K important to KNOW? How ‘bout you and G in words like NIGHT and LAUGH?”
“Well, they must be there for some reason,” E reasoned.
“Maybe,” S replied, “but I’m still more important than R.”
“Says who?” R demanded.
“Says me!”
“Oh yeah?”
“Oh, boy.” E smacked his forehead.
“Here we go…” O rolled his eye.
“HORSE has a very distinct sss sound,” S explained. “The R is hardly articulated!”
SeñoritaMafioso Feb 9, 2013

“Yes, well without my rrr, this HORSE is just a HOSE!” R bragged pompously.
“All the letters work together to make a word,” H lectured. “Every one of us has our own part to play; our own sound to contribute—”
“Shut up, H!” the middle portion of HORSE yelled, while E sighed in exasperation.
“Do you need more examples of unnecessary letters?” O exclaimed. “You shouldn’t be in HOUR, WHEN, or HERB. G is in GNOME for some unfathomable reason. And why is P in PNEUMONIA?”
“I don’t need to be in that word, either,” E added.
“And don’t even get me started on WEDNESDAY.”
“Okay, okay, okay,” H said crossly. “Maybe some letters aren’t quite as essential as some of the others in their word.”
“Like you,” R mumbled to S.
“Whatever.”
“But,” H continued, throwing a glare at R and S, “each letter in this word is.”
“You don’t hear E in HORSE,” O quipped.
“But I bring out your oh sound,” E countered.
SeñoritaMafioso Feb 9, 2013

“See?” H said, looking at R and S. “We’re all here for a reason—even E, who isn’t enunciated.”
“We may all be here for a reason,” R retorted, rounding on S, “but my rrr is more important than your sss!”
“It is not!” yelled S as HORSE’s extremities groaned in unison.
“So you’d rather be a HOSE?”
“HOSE is far better than what you’d be without me!”
“Oh yeah? Prove it!”
“Fine!” S rejoindered with his ends on his hips.
And with that, S stomped away, leaving HORE behind.
“Nice job, R,” O complained.
“HOSE is way better than HORE,” h said quietly, lowercasing herself in shame.
“Hey,” greeted W, who had just walked up. “I heard you need another letter.”
He stood next to h, who shrank down to subscript in mortified silence.
“At least now we’re spelled right,” O muttered dismally.
Jerry Balls Feb 9, 2013

☝Remember That Mobster #2☝
👊Mobster: Patsy Killine
👊Level: 87
👊Mob: 2.6K
☝☝
🌟First player to stack stamina and pretty much dominate the fight list in first 5 months of release.
🌟Always tinkering with weapons to maximize attack but spend little on upkeep.
🌟Highest Fight Win Percentage (at retirement)
🌟Most Fights (at retirement)
🌟Highest Level (at retirement)
🌟2nd Largest Mob (peak)
💢AGGRESSIVNESS💢
🌟Shake-N-Bake:
"Nick, just got attacked 10 times in an hour by Patsy Killine. I lost money on attacks 1-9, on the 10 attack she received no money, and I got no experience. This seems inconsistent with what you say above."
🌟Patsy:
"And in 35 hours i will attack Shake-N-Bake again. That will work out to about 8 attacks every 36 hours. And if he whines about it again I will chew his turf down to dirt holes next time I have 65 stamina points waiting to be spent."
💢AFTERMATH💢
🌟Patsy Killine still has turf in Frederick,Maryland and Winchester,Virginia and they are all at 28 influence.
By:Pingas
ShadowFenix Feb 9, 2013

👏👏👏👏👏 that horse one haha