advice pls π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯
Forums βΊ General Discussion βΊ advice pls π₯π₯π₯π₯π₯-
so here it is, im a 23 y/o married mom. my husband has been verbaly and physicaly abusive of late. ive started talking to my "dream guy" and im really into him, but would never cheat on my hubby! my friends are all telling me i married too young and to ditch the abusive hubby???? π₯π₯π₯πππ
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chezzy sian wrote:
u need to call the police next time he hits u there's no excuse for a man to hit a woman then press charges file for divorce and sue him also get a restrainig order to solidify tht u mean buissness there's no way he can win and he doesn't deserve to winso here it is, im a 23 y/o married mom. my husband has been verbaly and physicaly abusive of late. ive started talking to my "dream guy" and im really into him, but would never cheat on my hubby! my friends are all telling me i married too young and to ditch the abusive hubby???? π₯π₯π₯πππ
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Well talkin from experience it's never good to have split parents but at the same time it'll be even worse to stay with someone who's abusive. Now here's the thing u have to ask urself. IS THE GUY REALLY HIMSELF??? Is how he acts really how he is and is he good with kids. Also does he WANT a relationship that automaticly turns him into a father??? Then u measure the chances of that and put it all together. If he stays and u guys get married good for u. But the child will still have to suffer through the split parents issue their whole lives. Now if he doesn't stay then now ur a young single mom and that'll put u in a mess load of stress I know I still remember how my mom was. Now IF U DONT LEAVE then don't cheat either. That's never a good thing and never the answer to anythin. Just try to change ur husband and see the importance of becomin a good role model for ur child as well as an excelent provider concidering if he isn't one already,...(to be continued gtg do something)
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thank you for the advice π
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I totally have to disagree with primo loco, and agree with darth bane.
Primo, you can't 'change someone' he is doing what he is doing, it's part of him, that is what kind of man he is. A terrible father/husband/ person for laying a hand on his wife, the one he vowed to.
Chezzy sian, do what darth bane said, word for word.
Don't worry about your kids having to grow up without married parents. Maybe you will marry again to a Real man. You're child would rather their mother be single, or have boyfriends, rather than a husband that beats on you, and could one day beat on your kid. -
I say follow your heart π. You shouldnt have to take abuse from anyone especially physically. If u feel like u would be happier with that other guy, by all means go for it. Abusive relationships can only get worse. You should not tolerate any form of abuse.
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i feel really stupid for getting marrued so young but i meant every word of them vows, he is quite verbal to the little ones as well π
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I think you should cap hos turf. Then put a vendetta on him.
Then just Sam attack him all day long and farm himfor money.
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Leave him, it's not okay for anyone to hit anyone. He obviously has other problems and isn't good enough for you.
You're only 23, be happy and go with your dream guy. π»
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Nobody deserves to be with someone that's abusive. And u wouldn't want ur child growin up around that. If he is like that wit u, imagine when ur kid gets older. He might do the samething. You never know but then u wouldn't want to take the chance of the happenin cause then u gonna blame yourself if that's happens. It is a hard choice, maybe try to get him help. As a mother myself, I don't ever want my child to go thru something like that. Or to grow up in an abusive enivorment.
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chezzy sian wrote:
Don't feel stupid, it happens. I doubt he was like that until after y'all got married.i feel really stupid for getting marrued so young but i meant every word of them vows, he is quite verbal to the little ones as well π
You and your kids shouldn't have to go through that.
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ChainsawCharlie wrote:
lol i got a smile out of that πI think you should cap hos turf. Then put a vendetta on him.
Then just Sam attack him all day long and farm himfor money.
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First u should call ur mom sister or friend and get out of ur house, also having a support system in place. Nobody deserves to be abused. Then get help to work on your self esteem before you move on to the next person. I really wish u the best
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Mel T wrote:
yeah the self esteem thing is a good idea thankyou xFirst u should call ur mom sister or friend and get out of ur house, also having a support system in place. Nobody deserves to be abused. Then get help to work on your self esteem before you move on to the next person. I really wish u the best
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It shouldn't matter matter you have met another man or not. You must get away from the abusive marriage. It is not ok for either spouse to hit the other one. Plus, children growing up in an abusive home are much more likely to continue the cycle, either by being the abuser, or by seeking out an abuser. It is very unlikely the abuse will stop, more likely it will escalate. Don't let him suck you back in by apologizing & saying he'll never do it again or by saying you deserved it. You do not deserve it!
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It is much better for kids To have divorced parents than to live with married parents & watch or be abused. Like Mel said, you need to work on yourself before you can be with anyone else. Rushing into a new relationship would not be good for you, your kids, or the other guy. If he is that interested in you, he will give you all the time you need to heal. You also need to make sure you are seeing him for who he really is; almost anyone can seem like your dream person if you are unhappy & they are providing something different. Take care of yourself & your kids first!
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you guys give good advice π
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I think Bella should chime in on this ..dot elipse
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Just leave him it may seem scary and harsh but it isn't, think about it what if he starts beating your kids? Their probably too low a lv to start a vendetta so you need to get out while you can. Find a real man and don't feel stupid he's probably not the man you married, he's changed.
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One thing - remember the grass always looks better on the other side.
I would suggest taking advice from everyone - get out of the house with the kids to stop the abuse. I would than say perhaps worthwhile attending some counselling with or without husband to sort out your feelings.
I would not hook up with a new man until moved out - that way this cannot be used against you in any possible future court action - especially about access to the children.
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I have to say goto the dream guy!! I hate when "men"? Hit women.. It just shows there weak.
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The laws in the uk have changed to give you more power. Police don't need proof that you have been abused. Calling them for help should evict the husband for at least 24hrs which will give you time to get your stuff.
Once a wrong has been done, it's a lot easiser to do again... This isn't about morals, you have the right to be happy and not be afraid the next time he flips. Get out before you have kids with the man...
All this is my opinionβ
just the thought of hitting my missus makes me feel sick -
"I dont understand men who beat their spouse. If you dont like her now, imagine what shes gonna be like with two black eyes and a bit of a face on!"
"I also dont get why women stay with a wife beater, you know what they need... A slap"
(Jimmy Car, before you all beat my head in) -
dont get me wrong he dont punch me but he grabs me real hard and pushes etc and its left bruises i suppose i can only go up in the world now β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬β¬
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Buy a tazer then have sex with him and whilst your working your magic stun that motherfucker
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Wow, sounds like you guys had some seriously backward laws in the UK before! Needing proof that you were abused? That's nuts!
You do not have to be punched for it to count as physical abuse. You know whether what he did was physical abuse. You've had all the advice you need. You just need to take a deep breath, and get you and your kids out of the house, now! In fact, the next time you post, you should be telling us it's from someone where else, somewhere safe!
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"Physical abuse is abuse involving contact intended to cause feelings of intimidation, injury, or other physical suffering or bodily harm."
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