When girls don't put out
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When girls don't put out!!
This was written by a guy...it is GREAT!I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'
I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep..
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The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'
We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... She was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
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are you a human?
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I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all Dear, let's go to the cashier.'
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'
I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either... but at least the bitch knows I'm smarter than her.
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kill yourself.now
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Soooo...did she put out after? I'm confused.
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Haha! Damn!
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Oh?I get it,he should kill himself
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Goto the next one!! Fast!!
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What's for supper?
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Lmfao.
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thats great. im telling everyone that tommorow! :D
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Lmao. Funny shit.
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BigBK wrote:
Soooo...did she put out after? I'm confused.
it's a joke!!
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Roflmfao
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Lols thats good 😺👍
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That's funny
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Lol
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I should try this, in a suit of armor, eod suit, and a bullet proof vest of course lol
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I thought this was going to be a semi-seriouse thread, but to my relief and joy, it is not.
Made me smile. Good work.
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ROTFLMAO!!!! 😹😹😹
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LMFAO!!!! didnt even see that coming
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If girls don't put out just HIT EM dawg.
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Bump because this is so funny!
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Mr. Linderman wrote:
Haha! Damn!
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Mystery wrote:
Bump because this is so funny!
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Lol I think I really would be killed if I did that.
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Damn thats funny is it a joke or did it really happen ?
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I think it's a joke, but either way it's genius! 😄
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Mystery wrote:
I think it's a joke, but either way it's genius! 😄
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Thts fuckin great lol
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